I killed my dream to be a Taekwondoin

My wife knows that one of my childhood dreams was to be a boxer. Yes. I once loved to have become a boxer. You may know me as a researcher, university lecturer, speaker, writer and youth development expert, but not as one who ever wanted to be a boxer (small Apeh, a boxer? Hahahaha). I am thrilled by the stories of people like Mohammed Ali, Mike Tyson, Manny Pacquiao. In fact, I have recently fell in love with the adventures of people in the UFC like Connor McGregor, and Rondy Rousey who was just recently defeated the second time by Amanda Nunes. Yes, I know these people too.

But I gave up on my love for boxing long ago without trying for once, even though I still follow the game. Why? I ‘thought’ I didn’t have anyone to motivate me then. I hinged my failure to follow one of my passions on that single excuse of ‘not having anyone to motivate me’. I’ll come back to that in a bit. Let’s talk about becoming a ‘Taekwnodoin’.

Growing up, my childhood and early teenage was filled with lots of karate, shaolin and kick-boxing movies. I would spend several hours most weekends with other least 10, sometimes, 15 of us, clustered and pressing on each other for space to gain a better view, watching one of such movies in a sitting room, probably owned by the father of one of us, who was rich enough to buy one of those old Panasonic VHS player and a ‘coloured’ TV. And, to us, it was all that a ‘good life’ was all about.

Well, I ended growing up with the hope that one day, I could be like those fighters I always see in movies. So, when I went to the University, I got to know about ‘TaeKwondo’, a Korean martial art, and there existed a Taekwondo club in the University. You can imagine the excitement in my eyes as I thought that would give me opportunity to finally become a martial artist, since I lost out in becoming a boxer. I went to observe their training several times until something happened.

It was on the fateful day I decided to join the club. So, I went to the training ground as usual, to observe, and wait till the end of the training to divulge my interest to the ‘Coachie’. Then. Suddenly. One of the guys training was kicked at the wrong place and down he goes. He had lost consciousness. Oh my God! I thought he was dead. A quick first aid intervention by some of the members of the club was handy. And after a few minutes, the guy was back up but screaming with pains like a baby. That was my last day there. I guess, you would’ve done same right?

Fear. Yes, fear, like never before gripped me totally in its arm, wrapped like a hamburger. There and then, every passion left me. I thought to myself, “is this how I’m gonna end my life?” If someone as huge as this guy can go down like this, it then means I would be easily thrown away like a “paper plane” considering the fact that I am already ‘miniature’ in nature (please, don’t laugh too much).

Here is the point, my friend. Two times in my life, I was stoppep going for my dreams. I am happy I know more now, but I know that there are many people out there who are daily being stopped from going for their dreams. They are either waiting for someone to motivate them, or just like me then, they are too afraid to go on in pursuit of their dreams.

There is no one, I mean, no one on earth who can motivate you more than ‘YOURSELF’. It is you, who must first motivate yourself. In fact, other people would be mpliable to motivate you when they see how motivated you are by yourself first. How do you feel when you meet someone asking for help and yet not doing anything to show he or she is ready to go all the way by himself or herself? I guess you won’t take such person serious. Life will not take you serious if you continue to wait for some father, mother, uncle, brother, sister, friend to motivate you. It is your life, man. You’ve got to stand and face it, whether good or bad, come rain, come shine.

There is on one, I mean, no one on earth who does not face a fearful situation in their daily life. The difference is in how we all react to such situation. Those who go on to succeed know on fear. They know that it is just a little distress that lasts for a short time. When we give in to fear, we are degrading the internal strength that resides in us. We are limiting the courageous man or woman within. We are also denying ourselves a life time experience of abundance of joy and fulfillment in pursuing our dreams.

You have held other people accountable for not being motivated by them. You have lived enough in fear. This is the year to say no more to these. This is the year to wake up everyday and tell yourself, Apeh, you can do this. This is the year to try those things you’ve always been afraid of. When you decide deep down in your heart to do these then God (nature if that’s what you call Him) will connive and stand with you and you will see how far you’ll go by this time next year.

This is my story. I’m no longer living it. But, there are many out their that are still living the story.


This is my call to myself. This is my call to you. If you got to this point in this write up, then……… Rise. Ride on. Rule.

Let’s make 2017 a blockbuster!

Photo by Jesper Aggergaard on Unsplash

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